May 19, 2025

TMIT 08: Family Money (+ Experiment Update)

TMIT 08: Family Money (+ Experiment Update)

🎙️ TMIT 08: Family Money

In this episode, we explore how to make the implicit explicit when it comes to money at home. This isn’t a how-to talk about chores and allowances (no jars labeled Spend, Save, Share here). Instead, we reflect on the subtle ways money influences us—and how to start naming (and questioning) those influences out loud.

TMIT about Family Money: Accept that money influences our family culture, whether we realize it or not.

Our 3-step process to becoming more intentional about money:

  1. Reflect on our own money beliefs.
  2. Normalize money talk within our family.
  3. Invite kids into the process.

We also discuss:

  • Why reflecting on our own money stories is the first step (shoutout to Money Scripts by Dr. Brad Klontz).
  • What kinds of low-stakes, everyday money stories we want to start sharing with the kids.
  • A moment from Way of the Warrior Kid , where a boy buys a $2 junkyard bike and spends the summer fixing it—highlighting the value of hard work, creativity, and time well spent.
  • How what we value highly (in our case, time) determines many of the choices we make daily—and what that means for the next generation.

Listen here: Spotify | Apple Podcasts

Take the MoneyScripts quiz here!

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Hey guys, it's Greg.
Real quick before we jump in, we

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know we're throwing a lot at you
in these first eight episodes,

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so we made a little CHEAT SHEET
with the most important

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takeaways.
Let's be honest, Danielle made

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it.
If you want it, sign up for our

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00:00:14,840 --> 00:00:20,480
newsletter at tmitpod.com.
That's TMIT, the most important

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00:00:20,480 --> 00:00:26,200
thing, pod.com or e-mail us at
high at tmitpod.com and we'll

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00:00:26,200 --> 00:00:28,400
send it your way.
Hope you're loving the show.

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Welcome to The Most Important
Thing.

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I'm Danielle DeMarco Neufeld.
And I'm Greg Neufeld, and

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together we're exploring how
ambitious busy families can

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build culture at home.
Because after all, family is the

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most important thing.
Indeed it is.

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Indeed.
Hi, Greg.

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Hi, Danielle.
So today we are.

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That is what you call me.
So today we are talking about

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family money.
So why did we want to have an

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episode on family money?
My answer is because it feels

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like something that we ought to
be talking about that we haven't

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really.
I mean, you and I are pretty

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intentional and we haven't
necessarily discussed what we

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will talk about with the kids
about money.

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We've said we don't like buying
lots of plastic and we don't

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like many things.
Yeah, but more than that, it

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seems like it's been pretty
illusory.

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Yep.
So unlike some of the previous

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episodes where we had done some
of the work, I don't think that

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we've done very much of the work
at all.

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And part of the interest in
creating this episode is to

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learn what work there is to do
for now and for later and for

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Sunday.
Yeah, and I would say we had a

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conversation with a friend the
other day that works a lot with

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multi generational wealthy
families.

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And we were talking about how
family culture comes up in the

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context of her job.
And one of the things that she

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said to me at the end of the
conversation was, you know,

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Danielle, I know you don't
really feel like talking about

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money with your kids, but you
probably should.

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And she said it in a very nice
way, But that was my take away.

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And I was like, you know what?
She's right.

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Yeah.
It's something that you and I

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are so close to in the sense
that we've both spent more than

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a decade in the investment
world.

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And talking about money as far
as a deal that gets done or

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investment performance is
something that we do day in and

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day out.
But it hasn't been something

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that we've navigated
intentionally with our family.

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Yep.
Also, it's close to two decades.

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Yep, that's true.
OK.

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Yeah.
So as far as setting the context

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window is concerned, then we
have tried allowance,

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particularly with Hunter, and
that ended up just being a

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situation where every couple of
weeks when she got enough

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allowance, she would beg us to
go to Target and buy junk.

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And that didn't really feel like
it was driven by our values.

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Yep.
And you know, a lot of questions

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about money in the house from
the kids.

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Like what?
They're just curious, like, how

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much does the house cost?
How much money do you have?

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How?
Much money do you have?

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Yeah, those are common
questions.

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Those are common questions.
Yeah.

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And so I think ultimately I'm
looking for a way to talk about

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and socialize the idea of money
as a tool to live within our

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values.
Let's talk about what this

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episode is not about because
that was actually my biggest

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sticking point when we started
talking about having this

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episode.
This episode is not called How

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to Teach Your Kids about Money.
This is not an episode where we

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are going to get into the debate
about whether you should give

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allowance for chores or just
give allowance.

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And we are certainly not going
to suggest that you give your

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kid 3 jars and write on them.
Spend, share and save.

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We have those in a closet.
I just gave them away.

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Oh nice.
Well, so then everything was in

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the give there.
You go.

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Not that those things don't
work, maybe they do.

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They haven't worked for us.
But really I think that there

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needs to be a foundation prior
to that.

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Maybe we'll get there, maybe we
won't.

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I think you and I are pretty
caught up in this idea of like,

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why am I going to go to the ATM
and get my children paper money

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when that is not anything that
we use in real life?

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So that's number one.
And #2 is our kids just buy junk

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so far.
So I have no interest in giving

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them money.
And I'm sure there are a couple

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of other things.
But so this is really for us,

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maybe y'all are ahead of us, but
for us it really has to be a

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foundational episode of what do
we even want to talk about when

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it comes to money and how do we
make those decisions.

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Yeah, money represents values
and actions, and the actions

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that we take with our money
really do reflect our values.

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And I think that just finding a
way to communicate those back to

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our children about why we spend
money the way that we do and why

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we don't spend money on certain
things is a really good

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foundation for us to then build
on.

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Yeah, OK.
I feel like we probably have

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enough of a context window.
Definitely.

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OK, great.
So what is the most important

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thing about family money?
It is accepting the fact that

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money is influencing our family
culture already, whether we

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realize it or not.
Yes.

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And therefore I suggest a la
Claire Hughes Johnson, one of my

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personal role models in the
former COO of Stripe.

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We make the implicit explicit.
And so I have a plan as usual.

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Yeah, they think it's a
three-step process.

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Step one, reflect on our own
money stories.

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Get clear on our personal
beliefs and values around money

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ourselves, both individually and
other couple.

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Step 2, Normalize money talk and
everyday life.

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I would like us to start weaving
in mini, honest, low stakes

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conversations about money with
the kids and then step three,

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once they've had a foundation of
those types of conversations, to

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invite them into the decision
making process around money.

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How does that sound to you?
It sounds great.

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OK, so step one, reflect on our
own money stories.

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So I asked you to take a quiz
from the folks at Money Scripts.

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And so Money scripts are
unconscious beliefs we hold

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about money, often shaped by our
upbringing and life experience.

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The term was coined by Doctor
Brad Clontz and Dr. Ted Clontz,

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2 financial psychologists and
researchers.

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Their work includes studies in
peer reviewed journals like the

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Journal of Financial Planning.
They identified 4 core money

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scripts.
The first one's money avoidance,

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believing that money is bad or
undeserved.

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The second is money focus,
thinking that more money will

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solve all of life's problems.
The third is money status,

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linking self worth to net worth.
And the 4th is money vigilance,

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being cautious and secretive
about money.

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So the idea is that
understanding your money script,

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presumably by taking this quiz,
can help you see how past

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messages about money may be
influencing your present day

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decisions, often times without
you realizing it.

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So did you take the quiz?
I sure did.

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OK, what did you think, What did
you find and what did you think?

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So according to this quiz, I'm
hot most highly correlated with

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money focus.
Which makes sense.

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I work in venture capital.
I focus on finding companies

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that can grow very quickly, very
rapidly, to generate large

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outlier outcomes.
And I live in South Florida, so

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the fact that I'm a 3.5 out of 6
feels about right.

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OK.
Sounds good.

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Yeah, I can see that in you.
OK, Money focus, that is the

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script that you most dominantly
hold.

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But even that it's relatively
loose according to their scale.

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Interesting.
OK.

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So for me, the money script that
I held most strongly was money

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vigilance, and that's the one
that says you must be careful

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and responsible with money.
I don't think that's surprising

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to either of us.
I mean, when you met me, I had

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all of my savings in one bank
account as opposed to any type

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of risky investments, right?
So I think that I hold that less

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strongly than I did 10 years
ago.

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But it is definitely the one
that stands out for me the most.

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And I can say for certain that
comes from my parents.

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Yeah, it's definitely the way
that I was raised is to not take

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financial risks and to save
everything possible.

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And so I looked at the tips they
said for the people who are

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money vigilant, and they had a
couple of good ones, but the one

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I like the most is to budget for
joy.

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So they suggested creating a fun
money budget and using that to

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design some kind of like weekend
getaway or use it for a new

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gadget or a hobby that I've been
putting off.

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So I thought that was good.
And it's something that you and

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I have discussed over time.
I think we're taking a lot more.

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We're taking more vacations and
adventures this year and

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budgeting for that, which feels
nice.

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It does.
So I feel like I'm working on my

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money vigilance in that way.
I have a couple other notices

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around the money that I wanted
to mention that didn't

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necessarily show up on the money
scripts Quiz 1 is that we value

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our time greatly in our home.
So that often means that we use

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money to pay people to do things
that we don't think it's worth

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our time.
This is something I have

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definitely learned from you.
Yeah, I don't know where I got

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it.
Greg thinks his time is worth oh

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man, like an infinite amount
because he rarely does something

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if he can have someone else do
it.

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That's true, so I wanted to
mention it.

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So examples would be we always
get our groceries delivered.

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We have a handyman that comes
over often to do everything from

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hanging pictures to building
bunk beds.

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We think a lot about commuting
times from anything from doctors

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to extracurriculars or even the
schools that our children go to.

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It is definitely a strong
element in the way that we use

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money and I wanted to mention it
because it is something that I

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did not learn growing up.
I came from a family where we

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spent almost every weekend
fixing up the house or doing

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some type of project that would
never even occur to my family to

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outsource.
I mean, my dad still washes his

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own windows and he really
doesn't need to.

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And so I wonder if there is
something worth exploring here

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because I do think our kids do
not know anything about what it

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means to not hire out and to
consider doing things ourselves.

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I will never forget when we
lived in New York in our New

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York City apartment and Hunter
was two years old and a light

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bulb went out and she said call
Hom D, which is was the name of

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our handyman in our New York
apartment building.

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So it's definitely something the
kids have learned.

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I mean, Carlos is like
Maverick's favorite person

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because he's always doing
handiwork around our house.

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Greg's looking at me and kind of
shaking his head.

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So historically you have not
been open to the idea of using

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your free time to do things
around the house.

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Yeah.
Which you know, you are handy

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actually when you.
White handy unless it has.

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To do with technology or
electronics, that is the only

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thing that you will not let
anyone else touch.

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But you would never ask Carlos
to help you set up a computer or

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something like that.
So I developed this framework by

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myself, but it's been reinforced
by some pretty smart people that

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I've listened to, like Remit
Sethi who talks about how he

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loves really nice clothes and
drives a Toyota Camry.

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That's his trade off.
Or Naval Rabacon who's like, I

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won't even return anything on
Amazon.

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I just throw it away because
it's not worth my time.

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Like I'm actually a pretty
frugal person and will go

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through the process to return
things or getting money back on

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00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:58,800
a banana that shows up.
That's not good.

220
00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:01,680
And that gives me joy to know
that I can take some of that

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money back, but I get no joy
from doing the activities that I

222
00:13:06,400 --> 00:13:10,040
hire out for.
And so while I understand the

223
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:13,160
perspective of modeling for our
children, our children don't

224
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have to tire out for these
things.

225
00:13:14,840 --> 00:13:16,920
They can certainly do
themselves.

226
00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:20,560
But that's my value.
And that's the thing that I that

227
00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:23,320
I pride myself on is I've got
only so many hours in a day.

228
00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:26,160
I need to learn to delegate.
And I still am learning to

229
00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:29,360
delegate things everyday that I
want to take on myself.

230
00:13:29,360 --> 00:13:30,800
But I'm like, no, I can't touch
that.

231
00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:34,160
Sure.
OK, so I'm hearing it's a no for

232
00:13:34,160 --> 00:13:39,920
now, which is just fine with me.
But I guess I just wanted to

233
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:42,120
make the implicit.
Explicit in the sense that if we

234
00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:44,720
could even just talk to our kids
about we made this choice.

235
00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:46,560
Like, Daddy could have built
your bunk beds.

236
00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:50,120
But we think very highly of
Carlos's work.

237
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He is a trusted person in our
life.

238
00:13:53,560 --> 00:13:57,800
And we are paying because we
would rather spend that time

239
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:02,440
playing with you on a Saturday
or Daddy would rather spend some

240
00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:05,120
of that time working than doing
it ourselves.

241
00:14:05,320 --> 00:14:07,520
Yeah.
I grew up doing a lot of the

242
00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:11,520
handiwork and stuff with my dad,
but the thing that always struck

243
00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:15,360
me as particularly odd was that
he didn't have any of the tools.

244
00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:18,760
Like he would always go and
borrow them from our neighbor

245
00:14:18,760 --> 00:14:20,320
who have the nicer tools.
That's.

246
00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:22,400
Funny.
Yeah, like we would be building

247
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:25,760
TV cabinets with the little
screwdrivers and Allen wrench

248
00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:29,640
things that came in the box.
And I'm like, where's the drill?

249
00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:33,040
Having the right tools is also a
big deal for you.

250
00:14:33,040 --> 00:14:35,480
I understand.
OK, Well, it's a notice.

251
00:14:35,520 --> 00:14:40,880
You know, I'm recalling that
recently the girls and I read

252
00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:43,840
the second book in one of our
favorite book series, which is

253
00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:45,280
called The Way of the Warrior
Kid.

254
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:48,200
It's by Jocko Willick, who's the
former Navy SEAL.

255
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:50,760
And basically the point of the
book is discipline equals

256
00:14:50,760 --> 00:14:53,160
freedom.
And it's all these kind of.

257
00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:55,280
Do pull ups.
Yeah do pull ups.

258
00:14:55,360 --> 00:14:56,760
It's amazing.
Highly recommend.

259
00:14:57,040 --> 00:15:01,360
But anyway, in the book, the boy
Mark buys a bike at a junkyard

260
00:15:01,360 --> 00:15:06,960
for $2.00 and he and his friend
Nathan, who has no money, spend

261
00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:10,480
the summer fixing it up together
for Nathan.

262
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:17,280
So it's kind of like the joy of
a job well done and quite

263
00:15:17,280 --> 00:15:19,680
frankly, something productive to
do with their time instead of

264
00:15:19,680 --> 00:15:23,240
being bored over the summer.
So it's just a different

265
00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:29,440
perspective on how to think
about hard work and time.

266
00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:32,600
I think you did a great job
embodying this while outsourcing

267
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:37,840
the other day, by the way, you
had the brilliant idea of asking

268
00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:42,200
Carlos to stain the shutters
that had gotten sun bleached as

269
00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:46,480
opposed to us hiring out to
somebody to make new ones or

270
00:15:46,480 --> 00:15:48,640
going to buy new ones.
That I thought that was

271
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:50,240
brilliant because he did a
beautiful job.

272
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:54,480
And that was you repurposing
something that existed,

273
00:15:54,800 --> 00:15:58,160
outsourcing it to a person who
was not in the business of doing

274
00:15:58,160 --> 00:16:01,560
that, but came away with a
really great product.

275
00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:05,400
Reminds me of that $2.00 bike.
And it just happened to be that

276
00:16:05,400 --> 00:16:07,080
it was Carlos doing the work.
Interesting.

277
00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:12,880
I, I will add that you are
excellent at sourcing great

278
00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:14,480
talent.
Thank you.

279
00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:18,880
And so and and maintaining
wonderful relationships with

280
00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:22,600
that talent.
So while you do like to delegate

281
00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:27,720
things, you have found a host of
folks from our nanny to Carlos,

282
00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:31,920
our handyman to the pool people.
I can keep going that are

283
00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:35,800
excellent at their craft and
have a very high standard for

284
00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:37,520
all of the projects that they do
here.

285
00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:43,120
And you are great at making sure
that they know both verbally and

286
00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:46,320
monetarily that we value them.
Yeah, as are you.

287
00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:51,200
Thanks.
OK, so we really value time.

288
00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:54,760
We really value time because we
really value things like sleep,

289
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:58,720
we really value things like
exercise, we really value things

290
00:16:58,720 --> 00:17:02,160
like togetherness, We really
value things like food, food

291
00:17:02,160 --> 00:17:04,200
that we make at home.
Anyway, you're getting you're

292
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:05,839
getting down the Neufeld rabbit
hole.

293
00:17:05,839 --> 00:17:08,440
But yes, more to be revealed
there.

294
00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,119
OK.
And then so, but I want to

295
00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:17,440
circle back on this idea of the
kids can make their own choices

296
00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:21,599
about whether to delegate
something or hire out for it.

297
00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:25,359
And a question that came up in
some of my research that I think

298
00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:29,920
it's worth considering is, are
we passing down a lifestyle to

299
00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:33,160
our children that they will have
a hard time supporting?

300
00:17:34,680 --> 00:17:38,840
It's a very good question.
I think that when it comes to

301
00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:42,600
values, every person is going to
have their own values and we

302
00:17:42,600 --> 00:17:45,640
need to communicate why these
are our values and see if it

303
00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:49,640
matches up with theirs because
there's always choices.

304
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,760
There's always choices with
money.

305
00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:53,680
You can do this or you can do
that.

306
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:58,600
You can learn to do your laundry
so that you don't need to send

307
00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:03,080
it out when you go to college,
or you can send it out and then

308
00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:07,240
not have the spending money to
go out at night.

309
00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:12,280
Like these are all choices.
And I don't think that 1 is

310
00:18:12,280 --> 00:18:13,960
better than the other.
I actually think that there's a

311
00:18:13,960 --> 00:18:18,360
lot of shame that's placed on
not doing something like laundry

312
00:18:18,360 --> 00:18:20,600
yourself.
But who cares?

313
00:18:21,640 --> 00:18:24,600
I mean seriously, who cares?
Like, if you don't want to do

314
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:27,000
laundry and that's something
that you hate and you have the

315
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:30,640
money to send it out and you're
willing to take that trade off,

316
00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:34,320
good for you.
Like that is a thoughtful

317
00:18:34,320 --> 00:18:38,840
choice.
OK, well I'm going back to this.

318
00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:45,520
Make the implicit, explicit idea
of we have chosen to have

319
00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:49,800
someone do our laundry.
There probably will come a time

320
00:18:49,800 --> 00:18:53,200
where we will teach our children
how to do laundry so that they

321
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:57,160
have choices.
There were many decades of my

322
00:18:57,160 --> 00:19:01,520
life that I did my own laundry,
right and did laundry for other

323
00:19:01,520 --> 00:19:04,440
members of my family.
Right now is not one of them.

324
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:08,280
So I think it's just an
important thing to consider as

325
00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:13,760
we are making choices because we
are preparing the child for the

326
00:19:13,760 --> 00:19:16,240
path, not the path for the
child.

327
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:19,920
I think that's one of our core
tenants as parents and so we

328
00:19:19,920 --> 00:19:24,440
want to make sure that they have
an opportunity to develop those

329
00:19:24,440 --> 00:19:28,640
life skills, even if we are
currently using money to allow

330
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:30,240
them to avoid it.
Agreed.

331
00:19:31,040 --> 00:19:36,640
So I think that we had a great
first conversation reflecting on

332
00:19:36,640 --> 00:19:39,080
our own money stories just now.
Right?

333
00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:44,440
OK, Step 2.
Normalize money talk in everyday

334
00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:47,400
life.
So I would like to broaden,

335
00:19:48,000 --> 00:19:52,560
maybe not this conversation, but
I would like to broaden the

336
00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:56,320
topic to mini money
conversations with our family.

337
00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,440
Again, minimum viable product.
They're 75 and three.

338
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:07,880
Only one of them kind of knows
math, so there isn't too much to

339
00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:11,440
do here.
But I do think that we can weave

340
00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:15,840
some money talk into our some of
our existing experiments,

341
00:20:16,240 --> 00:20:21,880
particularly with stories around
sharing successes and struggles

342
00:20:22,040 --> 00:20:27,880
with money with our children and
also with our values.

343
00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:31,560
So money as a tool to live with
our values within our values.

344
00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:34,920
As I said in our values
exercise, I love this idea of

345
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:38,160
success as the state of living
and working according to our

346
00:20:38,160 --> 00:20:40,840
values.
And I think that that applies to

347
00:20:40,840 --> 00:20:45,240
money as well.
So we can think about noble uses

348
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:50,160
of money, right?
So I asked ChatGPT to come up

349
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:54,280
with some everyday ways to be
noble with money, and I came up

350
00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:56,480
with a bunch of stuff.
Some of it I hated. 2 of them I

351
00:20:56,480 --> 00:21:01,600
absolutely loved. 1 is this idea
of delaying gratification, which

352
00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:05,520
I think is so paramount in life
in general, but it certainly

353
00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:08,440
applies to money.
To be able to say things like

354
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:11,360
we're not buying that right now
because we're saving for

355
00:21:11,360 --> 00:21:17,160
something more meaningful.
And then also to be open about

356
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:20,960
money missteps.
Like I overspent on that.

357
00:21:21,600 --> 00:21:26,120
I'm learning to be more careful.
That shows that growth is

358
00:21:26,120 --> 00:21:30,920
ongoing and it can build trust
within the family.

359
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:32,880
I never would have thought of
that.

360
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:36,240
So thank you, ChatGPT.
I like that a lot.

361
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:40,880
So I have some more ideas.
Like we recently got our pool

362
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:45,320
resurfaced and talking to them
about how we made that decision

363
00:21:45,320 --> 00:21:49,760
over a year ago and put money
aside specifically for this.

364
00:21:49,760 --> 00:21:52,720
And then we did it in the month
of April when we understood that

365
00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:54,080
supply costs would be the
lowest.

366
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:58,080
Just things like that and
sharing with them why we make

367
00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:01,600
certain choices.
Like we buy you relatively

368
00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:05,080
expensive shoes because they're
more supportive for your feet

369
00:22:05,120 --> 00:22:07,320
and we care about foot health,
but hell.

370
00:22:07,360 --> 00:22:08,840
That's funny.
That's true.

371
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,640
But this means take care of
them.

372
00:22:11,640 --> 00:22:13,120
Please don't ruin them
immediately.

373
00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:16,400
Yes, right.
I think that the conversation

374
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:21,120
for Jade and definitely for
Maverick will also be about why

375
00:22:21,120 --> 00:22:24,240
they don't get new things,
right.

376
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:27,800
So you have this bike because we
bought this bike for the family.

377
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:31,320
This is not Hunter's bike.
This is a family bike and we

378
00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:34,920
bought the best bike that we
could get so that we can use it

379
00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:35,760
three times.
Yep.

380
00:22:36,120 --> 00:22:39,160
It's a great point, totally.
I think it's just good to

381
00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:42,560
reinforce the why when, whenever
we give anything to these kids,

382
00:22:42,560 --> 00:22:46,600
let's just say the value that it
fulfills and why we were willing

383
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:48,160
to purchase it.
And if we're not willing to

384
00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:50,800
purchase something, same thing.
The why and the value that it

385
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:53,000
doesn't fulfill.
I think that's great.

386
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,880
That goes back to our stories
episode about sharing meaning.

387
00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:57,320
Yeah.
OK.

388
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:02,200
And then step three, invite kids
into the process.

389
00:23:02,720 --> 00:23:05,720
So once we've laid the
foundation with some of these

390
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:10,480
mini conversations, I think it
makes sense to involve them more

391
00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:15,560
in some decision making
overtime, especially low stakes

392
00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:18,960
things where we can help them
with experiential learning

393
00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:21,720
opportunities.
I've heard it said in finance

394
00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:27,160
circles that I would rather my
kid blow $60.00 on some junk at

395
00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:32,040
Target than $60,000 on a degree
that isn't going anywhere.

396
00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:34,680
Yeah.
So start small.

397
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:38,280
So one of the things I thought
about, which we have six months

398
00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:42,560
until birthday season here, but
we could give Hunter in

399
00:23:42,560 --> 00:23:45,600
particular a budget for her 8th
birthday party.

400
00:23:47,120 --> 00:23:50,960
Yeah, and for school supplies
and for tuition.

401
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:53,560
School tuition, I mean, it's one
you keep bringing up.

402
00:23:54,080 --> 00:23:57,520
Because I think if she can pay
that bill out of her own

403
00:23:58,040 --> 00:24:01,440
brokerage account and see that
every month that that's how much

404
00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:04,240
is going, I think she's going to
like school a lot more.

405
00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:09,920
She doesn't have a basis for
thousands of dollars versus

406
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:12,400
hundreds of dollars versus 10s
of dollars.

407
00:24:12,520 --> 00:24:16,960
I think she will have a basis
for thousands of dollars just

408
00:24:17,920 --> 00:24:21,680
talking amongst like, if she's
paying that bill, hear me out,

409
00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:24,560
she's going to go to school and
be like, do you know how much it

410
00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:27,960
costs the school?
And that's a good conversation

411
00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:30,800
for kids to have.
Esther Wojacki talks about how

412
00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:34,640
the Japanese don't have janitors
and how they sweep up the

413
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:36,960
classrooms and clean everything
up themselves.

414
00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:40,560
And that is really what taking
pride in your school means.

415
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:43,840
And so, you know, if you're
paying that tuition bill.

416
00:24:45,120 --> 00:24:48,000
Interesting.
Well, I encourage you to support

417
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:49,600
her through that.
Run that experiment with her.

418
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:51,120
Absolutely, I'd like to try it
for this.

419
00:24:51,120 --> 00:24:52,840
Have her pay her tuition?
Why not?

420
00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:54,680
Exactly.
OK, great.

421
00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:57,840
Well, so that leads into my next
question, which is what

422
00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:00,040
experiments are we willing to
run around family money?

423
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:04,120
Oh, and by the way, that's an
Esterwood Jackie practice around

424
00:25:04,120 --> 00:25:06,240
paying tuition that I stole
around paying college.

425
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:08,680
But yeah.
You want to apply it to 3rd

426
00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:11,120
grade.
Basically, I don't see why not

427
00:25:11,360 --> 00:25:13,560
like that gives a basis for big
numbers I think.

428
00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:16,240
OK, Hey, why not?
If it doesn't work out, it

429
00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:18,040
doesn't work out.
That low stakes here.

430
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:19,560
This is a lot of fun.
Yeah.

431
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:21,400
OK.
So what experiments are we

432
00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:23,480
willing to run around family
money?

433
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:26,080
I think with regards to Step 1,
you and I have started the

434
00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:33,080
conversation around being more
explicit about our use of money

435
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:40,040
in a values oriented way.
And with regards to #2 as far as

436
00:25:40,040 --> 00:25:45,560
the normalizing money talks in
everyday life, what would you be

437
00:25:45,560 --> 00:25:50,640
willing to commit to?
This either starting with the Y

438
00:25:50,640 --> 00:25:56,000
or incorporating the value into
everything that is spent on

439
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:57,480
them.
OK, great.

440
00:25:57,720 --> 00:25:59,560
Right.
So how how Yeah.

441
00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:00,920
What's better way of of saying
that?

442
00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:07,800
OK, so I think it comes down to
sharing stories around struggles

443
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:11,120
and successes with money and
then also leveraging.

444
00:26:11,120 --> 00:26:14,080
I mean, there isn't much of A
better value in our family cheer

445
00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:18,760
than Noble for talking about
money and noble uses of money

446
00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:25,560
and then #3 inviting kids into
the process.

447
00:26:25,560 --> 00:26:28,240
I mentioned the birthday and you
said tuition, but I'm thinking

448
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:31,840
even small things again, minimum
viable products like allowing

449
00:26:31,840 --> 00:26:36,200
them the opportunity when we're
doing our weekly grocery check

450
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:40,440
out to look at the relative cost
of things and decide whether

451
00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:43,960
they want two types of fruit or
one bar of chocolate kind of

452
00:26:43,960 --> 00:26:45,080
thing.
Yeah.

453
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:48,680
OK, so there's so much to
unravel about money, huh?

454
00:26:49,440 --> 00:26:53,200
A ton to unpack.
I'd like to suggest that we keep

455
00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:57,320
it simple for now, but notice
when there are opportunities to

456
00:26:57,640 --> 00:27:04,280
weave money conversations into
our everyday comings and goings

457
00:27:04,320 --> 00:27:07,160
and choices that we're making.
Yes.

458
00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:11,160
So to recap, what's the most
important thing about family

459
00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:13,960
money?
It is influencing our family

460
00:27:13,960 --> 00:27:15,760
culture whether we realize it or
not.

461
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:19,840
That's right.
And so we're going to do three

462
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:22,160
things.
Reflect upon our own money

463
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:25,960
stories.
Yep, and share them and.

464
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:30,600
Share them with one another,
normalize money talk in everyday

465
00:27:30,600 --> 00:27:33,320
life and invite kids into the
process.

466
00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:37,040
Love it.
And we'd love to hear from

467
00:27:37,040 --> 00:27:41,280
families that are doing this
already with their kids, with

468
00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:45,000
older kids that, you know, we're
getting some responsibilities

469
00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:48,560
around money, how you're
handling this, especially in the

470
00:27:48,600 --> 00:27:53,720
age of no more paper money, no
more checkbooks, no more going

471
00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:56,440
to the bank and talking to the
teller.

472
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:59,840
Yeah, and what are your values
around money 'cause I would bet

473
00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:01,040
that they would differ from
ours.

474
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:07,600
So we would love to hear how you
use money as a way to live

475
00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:12,720
within your values as well.
Agreed, I think there's probably

476
00:28:12,720 --> 00:28:17,120
some deep dive into the Reddit
fire and fat fire communities

477
00:28:17,120 --> 00:28:19,880
that we could do here as well
for some creative ideas.

478
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:22,600
All right, love you, Goosy.
Love you Goosy.

479
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:28,400
Welcome to our experiment update
where we recap what we've tried

480
00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:31,960
at home, how it worked or
didn't, and what we're tweaking

481
00:28:31,960 --> 00:28:34,680
next.
Danielle, we've been running a

482
00:28:34,680 --> 00:28:37,680
lot of experiment updates,
probably the most of any of the

483
00:28:37,680 --> 00:28:43,000
listeners.
What do you think about how

484
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:44,920
they've been going so far in
aggregate?

485
00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:46,080
Do you think that we're on to
something?

486
00:28:47,120 --> 00:28:49,960
I really do.
I felt great about the flow of

487
00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:54,560
this weekend in particular.
I feel like we are dedicating

488
00:28:54,560 --> 00:28:57,680
space.
It feels like we have different

489
00:28:57,680 --> 00:29:02,200
zones for different types of
connection and that feels really

490
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:04,840
good.
It sure does think these kids

491
00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:07,680
really notice.
I mean, Maverick gave me a huge

492
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:11,600
hug after nap yesterday and that
never happens.

493
00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:14,840
Yeah, you guys have definitely
been strengthening your your

494
00:29:14,840 --> 00:29:18,120
bond lately.
Indeed, So I don't want to take

495
00:29:18,120 --> 00:29:21,920
up too much time on these
experiment updates, but I do

496
00:29:21,920 --> 00:29:23,160
think that they're all
important.

497
00:29:23,160 --> 00:29:25,800
So should we start with the
family meal?

498
00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:28,760
Absolutely.
All right, so minimum viable

499
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:33,880
product was let's go outside and
eat popsicles together after 5.

500
00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:37,520
Yes, but Jade and Maverick chose
the popsicles and we made them

501
00:29:37,520 --> 00:29:41,080
together on Thursday, which I
think was a cute add on, so they

502
00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:45,160
were very excited about it.
Yes, now great call doing them

503
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:48,040
outside because my gosh were
they messy.

504
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:52,400
Indeed.
But tremendous results with a

505
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,360
boomerang effect because of the
sugar.

506
00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:59,800
So the kids were so happy, first
of all, that we were there with

507
00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:02,560
them, especially that I was
eating with them.

508
00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:05,000
I do not eat.
Dessert.

509
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:06,400
Dessert ever?
Yeah.

510
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:09,080
Or at 5:00 ever.
So it was actually really

511
00:30:09,080 --> 00:30:13,320
exciting to all sit down
together in a different location

512
00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:17,160
outside on the turf.
We were very relaxed and to eat

513
00:30:17,160 --> 00:30:22,160
something yummy and messy, yeah.
It was it was very special and

514
00:30:22,160 --> 00:30:24,720
we could have just gone inside
and we were ready to clean up.

515
00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:28,760
But we started talking about how
we were going to show them

516
00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:31,160
family movement and they were
like, why would we wait?

517
00:30:32,000 --> 00:30:37,880
Oh, wait, no, hold on, Greg.
We also asked questions about

518
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:40,880
how the week went.
Oh yeah.

519
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:43,640
And what do you not want to
bring into next week?

520
00:30:43,760 --> 00:30:46,440
And we had some awesome
responses.

521
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:51,000
Awesome responses.
So Jade really had some adorable

522
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,920
play ideas at her school, but
Hunter?

523
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:58,080
So on Thursday morning, she was
going on a field trip and she

524
00:30:58,080 --> 00:31:00,240
didn't think that her best
friend was going to be there.

525
00:31:00,800 --> 00:31:03,880
And she woke up in the morning
and pretended that she was sick.

526
00:31:04,680 --> 00:31:07,240
And then about an hour later
said, you know, mommy, the real

527
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:10,080
reason why I don't want to go is
because my friend's not going to

528
00:31:10,080 --> 00:31:13,080
be there.
And during family meal, she

529
00:31:13,080 --> 00:31:18,720
said, I want to change the way I
acted yesterday because I

530
00:31:18,720 --> 00:31:21,080
actually had a great time on the
field trip without her.

531
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:25,360
And I wish that I hadn't not
wanted to go.

532
00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:29,920
And we both separately later
that night and she told me, you

533
00:31:29,920 --> 00:31:32,280
guys are so weird.
You both told me that that was

534
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:38,960
such a reflective response, but
it was really fun too.

535
00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:41,960
It was a really nice, nice
little moment that we had, I

536
00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:45,560
mean, to start to see kind of
that metacognition, I guess, if

537
00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:48,520
you will.
But Hunter, also Hunter for the

538
00:31:48,520 --> 00:31:52,680
win during family meal said,
Mommy, you cannot give me all of

539
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:55,240
this sugar and then not ask me
to move my body.

540
00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:59,280
Let's do family movement now.
And Greg and I looked at each

541
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:01,640
other and we're like, oh, well,
OK, sounds good.

542
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:03,960
We're going to stay up a little
bit later, but that's all right.

543
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:07,320
And if, meanwhile, it was
actually already happening

544
00:32:07,320 --> 00:32:09,640
because Jade was running around
in circles like a dog trying to

545
00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:13,120
catch her table.
So that's just normal.

546
00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:17,640
So we ended up doing family
movement for the next, what, 30

547
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:21,280
to 45 minutes?
We practiced throwing and

548
00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:24,440
catching with footballs and
large balls.

549
00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:26,800
It was so nice.
It was really a lovely way to

550
00:32:26,800 --> 00:32:28,320
start the weekend.
It sure was.

551
00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:31,440
I can't believe that was Friday.
Like that feels like so long ago

552
00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:34,880
given how many experiments we've
been packing into the weekend.

553
00:32:34,880 --> 00:32:38,760
But it's it was that was the
best way to start the.

554
00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:39,920
Week.
It was so nice and they've

555
00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:42,920
already picked out lemon
popsicles for next weekend, so

556
00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:45,080
they're very excited.
Great.

557
00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:47,280
I got 2 thumbs up on Saturday
morning.

558
00:32:47,280 --> 00:32:49,640
I asked them how it went.
Everybody give it 2 thumbs up.

559
00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:53,600
Yeah.
So then on Saturday we did our

560
00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:58,760
pre meeting and our family pre
meeting is an important and

561
00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:01,680
necessary part of our family
meeting, we're finding.

562
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:05,640
So hope that as you're trying
this at home that you set aside

563
00:33:05,640 --> 00:33:10,040
some time to create an agenda
together and really get

564
00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:11,480
intentional about what you're
going to do.

565
00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:15,240
I think the kids look forward to
the Saturday pre meeting more

566
00:33:15,240 --> 00:33:18,200
than they do the Sunday meeting
because as soon as they woke up

567
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:21,360
on on Saturday morning they told
me about how we have to start

568
00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:22,640
voting.
They wanted to vote before you

569
00:33:22,640 --> 00:33:25,480
even came downstairs, Greg.
Yeah, I think they want to win.

570
00:33:25,520 --> 00:33:26,960
I think they're darn
competitive.

571
00:33:27,640 --> 00:33:30,040
They all want their own ideas.
Also, the idea of choosing the

572
00:33:30,040 --> 00:33:32,440
snack in the game feels fun.
Yes.

573
00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:36,640
So yeah, on Saturday we had our
Saturday pre meeting and we've

574
00:33:36,640 --> 00:33:40,800
continued it throughout the week
to try to talk about our family

575
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:42,960
value of the month, which is
being noble.

576
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:45,840
And so I've consistently said
that noble means doing the right

577
00:33:45,840 --> 00:33:49,280
thing even when it's hard and to
varying degrees I think that is

578
00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:51,560
caught on.
We also read, I attempted to

579
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:55,640
read a couple of noble stories,
particularly about Clara Barton

580
00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:58,160
this week, the founder of the
American Red Cross.

581
00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:04,760
And well, like me me muscle
menos, I would say.

582
00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:09,840
But this weekend, the Kocha Jar
came back with a vengeance,

583
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:11,880
people.
We didn't really use it too much

584
00:34:11,880 --> 00:34:16,159
during the week, but over the
weekend we had five or six

585
00:34:16,159 --> 00:34:20,040
different submissions by the
kids noticing noble acts of one

586
00:34:20,040 --> 00:34:23,520
another.
And Jade had the most adorable

587
00:34:23,520 --> 00:34:28,639
innovation to turn one of her
scraps of paper into a necklace.

588
00:34:28,639 --> 00:34:32,000
She said, Mommy, I actually want
to take this piece of paper and

589
00:34:32,000 --> 00:34:35,199
make a noble necklace out of it
because she was so proud of her

590
00:34:35,199 --> 00:34:38,199
noble act.
So before you knew it, we had

591
00:34:38,199 --> 00:34:40,679
three noble necklaces going on
this weekend.

592
00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:42,880
From the kids, it was very, very
sweet.

593
00:34:44,080 --> 00:34:49,199
And the safe hand strong hearts
call and response has also.

594
00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:53,600
I'd say it's been about 70%
effective, which is something.

595
00:34:54,159 --> 00:34:55,679
For sure.
It's definitely catchy.

596
00:34:55,679 --> 00:34:58,640
I mean sometimes they will
scream it in the same second of

597
00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:00,480
biting or hitting.
They'll be like, oh, say.

598
00:35:00,960 --> 00:35:02,400
Hey, there's been no biting this
week.

599
00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:06,080
So yes, often Maverick will be
screaming strong hearts while

600
00:35:06,080 --> 00:35:09,520
pinching someone.
But you can see that he has the,

601
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:13,880
let's call it like a
simultaneous behavior and

602
00:35:14,240 --> 00:35:17,800
thought process, right?
So it feels like.

603
00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:18,680
Progress.
It does.

604
00:35:19,120 --> 00:35:21,040
It does.
And then on Sunday we had our

605
00:35:21,040 --> 00:35:25,480
third family meeting.
Yeah, that was very smooth.

606
00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:28,960
Yeah, I think that everybody
knew what to expect this week.

607
00:35:29,120 --> 00:35:32,080
It was our third time doing it.
Everybody knew what to expect by

608
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:35,080
the third time, which felt good.
I felt a little bit different

609
00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:38,320
kind of moving from that
storming to that forming phase,

610
00:35:38,320 --> 00:35:41,480
if you will.
Yeah, it really did.

611
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:44,320
I personally really liked
learning how to do something

612
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:46,200
together.
So this week we did learn how to

613
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,560
make paper airplanes.
And I still can't really make a

614
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:50,200
paper airplane, but I'm
improving.

615
00:35:51,320 --> 00:35:55,440
But this idea of like this
tactile learning and not

616
00:35:55,440 --> 00:35:59,280
watching a video, Greg kind of
led the way was great.

617
00:35:59,280 --> 00:36:03,880
And you know, I think that I
quickly dismissed your idea of

618
00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:06,440
Hunter teaching us about
dinosaurs last week.

619
00:36:06,880 --> 00:36:10,680
But I think that upon further
reflection, it seemed almost

620
00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:12,960
like you did teach us how to
make paper airplanes this

621
00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:14,640
weekend because you're the only
one that knew how to do it.

622
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:22,040
And that was really nice.
So sorry, and I'd like to

623
00:36:22,240 --> 00:36:25,280
consider that for next week.
We tried this idea of someone

624
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:30,160
teaching us how to do something.
OK so to recap, family meeting.

625
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:34,120
We still love the Saturday pre
meeting and we're learning what

626
00:36:34,120 --> 00:36:36,760
works as far as the Sunday
meeting itself.

627
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:41,200
But before the play, it was only
about 25 minutes this week, so

628
00:36:41,200 --> 00:36:43,480
that felt like the right amount
of time.

629
00:36:43,720 --> 00:36:44,880
Yeah, we're not talking about
hours.

630
00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:47,400
Here, and this was actually the
longest play that we did at the

631
00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:49,920
end of our family meeting
because it really was family

632
00:36:49,920 --> 00:36:53,120
play as well as family stories.
Typically our play has been like

633
00:36:53,120 --> 00:36:54,840
a game of Zingo or a round of
Pictionary.

634
00:36:55,080 --> 00:36:56,120
Right.
Yeah.

635
00:36:56,120 --> 00:37:00,240
So this week I brought out a big
bag of photos that I had already

636
00:37:00,240 --> 00:37:04,680
scanned into an online album.
And it's kind of meta because

637
00:37:04,680 --> 00:37:07,440
I'm like, actually these photos
would be perfect for the kids to

638
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:11,680
to learn about my family and to
make a physical album.

639
00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:14,360
So I think I pulled a lot of
these out of a physical album.

640
00:37:14,360 --> 00:37:16,880
And now I'm having the kids
remix them into an album while

641
00:37:16,880 --> 00:37:20,000
teaching them about my parents
and my grandparents, who none of

642
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:23,360
them are alive, unfortunately.
So the kids are learning that

643
00:37:23,360 --> 00:37:25,280
way.
And I think we all had, I think,

644
00:37:25,280 --> 00:37:28,520
a beautiful time just sitting
there going through photos and

645
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:31,520
sticking them in albums and
reading another album.

646
00:37:31,920 --> 00:37:34,520
What do you think?
I thought it was wonderful.

647
00:37:35,120 --> 00:37:37,880
So this definitely hits upon
family stories, but did it feel

648
00:37:37,880 --> 00:37:41,040
like play to you as well because
you had said that scrapbooking

649
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:43,280
would be a great idea of of play
for you I.

650
00:37:43,280 --> 00:37:45,440
Mean, I could have done that for
another hour or two.

651
00:37:45,440 --> 00:37:47,880
But did it feel like play?
Yes.

652
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:50,080
Cool.
I didn't check my phone once.

653
00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:51,960
I wasn't thinking about anything
else.

654
00:37:51,960 --> 00:37:55,160
So I think that's what that
would be my definition of play

655
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:57,400
these days, Something that takes
my mind off of everything else.

656
00:37:57,440 --> 00:37:59,040
Cool.
That's great.

657
00:37:59,560 --> 00:38:03,520
And then on family space, so we
have the kids, individual areas.

658
00:38:03,560 --> 00:38:06,040
That has been fine.
I asked them how they feel about

659
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:07,120
it.
They like having them, but there

660
00:38:07,120 --> 00:38:10,240
hasn't been much movement in the
space so far.

661
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:14,840
But the swap of the dining room
table to now become our kitchen

662
00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:20,640
table has been awesome.
We have played Settlers of

663
00:38:20,640 --> 00:38:23,680
Catan, done about 7 different
puzzles on that table.

664
00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:26,000
It's where we're having our
family meeting, but it doesn't

665
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:30,480
feel stuffy and we had a couple
meals there, which is awesome.

666
00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:32,640
We actually ate dinner together
this Sunday.

667
00:38:32,840 --> 00:38:35,520
We did wow crazy before the
family meeting.

668
00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:38,720
Yeah.
So what strong beliefs are you

669
00:38:38,720 --> 00:38:41,480
holding on to at home?
The strong belief that we were

670
00:38:41,480 --> 00:38:44,240
holding on to is, yes, we
eventually wanted a table in

671
00:38:44,240 --> 00:38:46,960
that room, but it couldn't be
the table that was in the other

672
00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:49,200
room like that, just.
Yeah, that's the fancy black.

673
00:38:49,200 --> 00:38:50,600
Table.
That's the fancy black table.

674
00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:53,600
And for whatever reason, this is
the furniture we bought the

675
00:38:53,600 --> 00:38:56,120
house with too.
You know, there's COVID times,

676
00:38:56,920 --> 00:38:58,800
times are rough.
Couldn't get any furniture.

677
00:38:58,800 --> 00:39:01,360
Now you can't get eggs.
The furniture was staged that

678
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:02,920
way and we just kept it that
way.

679
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:05,200
I think it was we had walked
into the house and we're like,

680
00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:08,040
oh, this is the way the house is
supposed to be downstairs.

681
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:11,200
And Danielle was like, you know,
I kind of want a table in the

682
00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:14,640
other room, but we should have a
round kitchen table.

683
00:39:14,640 --> 00:39:16,920
And I agree that should be the
ultimate goal.

684
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:20,800
But you're just let's do the
MVP.

685
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:23,920
Let's do the easy thing.
Hit press the easy button and

686
00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:25,880
just swap the furniture one room
to the other.

687
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,560
Game changer.
Absolute game changer.

688
00:39:28,680 --> 00:39:31,600
I agree, family space making it
adaptable.

689
00:39:32,400 --> 00:39:35,760
Yeah.
All right, so experiments are

690
00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:37,240
working out.
Well, they are.

691
00:39:37,520 --> 00:39:41,080
They are and I'm sure you heard
at the beginning of the episode,

692
00:39:41,080 --> 00:39:44,960
but we have the most important
thing tip sheet that Danielle

693
00:39:44,960 --> 00:39:50,960
here made for all of you to
follow along and understand the

694
00:39:51,160 --> 00:39:54,800
most important thing about each
episode as you're going in or as

695
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:58,720
you're refreshing yourself on
some of these experiments.

696
00:39:59,160 --> 00:40:05,960
You can get that from
usifyouemailushi@tmitpod.com or

697
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:10,360
sign up for our newsletter on
our website, tmitpod.com.

698
00:40:10,720 --> 00:40:15,760
We will send you the resource
and look forward to learning

699
00:40:15,760 --> 00:40:17,160
more about you all.
Right.

700
00:40:17,280 --> 00:40:18,840
Great.
Thanks everybody for listening.

701
00:40:18,960 --> 00:40:20,480
Love you Goosy.
Love you goosy.